Affective Dishonesty

Why do we use honesty as an alibi for our performances of dishonesty? The answers are innumerable. 1.) Fear of rejection; 2.) Little or no ontological understanding of self; 3.) Confusion (albeit believing in "I don't knows" is far too easy a retreat.) Perhaps getting at the why is inessential right now. Maybe the core of the issue is rather simple: the performance clown crops up when too many blows to the self's imagined sense of self is exposed in a rather ambigious and even arbitrary way. Lately, it appears that to live in an unexposed way means to secure a sense of stability--a flat landing that predicts only the predictable. Dishonest or not, the mere intrusion of any emotional spectrum that encompasses too much too fast or too little or obviously plays into excess means that a dishonest paranoia of sorts will play out. For we cannot feel so much at such time or so little in such place; it isn't real--although so real--to feel beyond logic.