Rolling Cigarettes

Tobacco saved in green paper
rolled tightly over a good-bye breakfast
strong coffee smells spilling into nervous chatter
and food--a lost attempt,
each bite symbolized a sooner end...for one.

I tried to take it all in: the city moving quickly as we played a lover's catch-up, the hands that lent me my fetish, the green eyes that never failed to tell me when you were some place else, that body moving in and out of conversation (crossed arms, crossed legs), and the waiter gone waitress escaping us for far too long.

I stood above you as we smoked. Sitting next to you: an intimacy I could not give you. You drank your black coffee and inhaled deeply. I looked at all the passerbys and remembered I never gave you up. You remembered the people from our past. Our memories were no longer the same.